• Ali Spiritual Life Coach

I find that this topic can be easily misunderstood. This is my opinion.

If a person is in an abusive relationship whether it is physically, verbally, manipulative etc...it does not mean that you stay in that relationship because you are told to love unconditionally even If you are treated badly, understanding what unconditionally means its important.

For me it means you do not take revenge on the person concerned and on yourself. You accept how this person is (loving him as a human being), but for your own safety whether it is physical or mental you need to distance yourself. You do not take the actions personally, but you understand that the person is acting this way because they have trauma/s that they never dealt with. Having said this the pain caused is still felt whether physically or mentally.

However, to heal yourself from this pain, you have try to see it from the perspective that I mentioned above, that pain somehow will start to diminish slowly. And you love the person as a human being (unconditionally).

Then there is the narcissistic side to this as well. A narcist will treat another person badly and will take a person for granted or use the term unconditional love to their advantage. Because they will use manipulation and make that person think that even if they are treating them badly, they should stay because this is what unconditional love is. Unconditional Love is loving a person and

seeing him as a human being just like you, no matter what they do, with all their faults. Because they have unresolved issues with themselves.

Unconditional love does not mean that you have to suffer any kind of abuse.

  • Ali Spiritual Life Coach

A few years back I started with my Spiritual Awakening journey, back then I had no idea what a Spiritual Awakening was. It was on a particular day when all of a sudden, I realised why I went through certain things in life. My past came in front of my face, my traumas came out of the closet because my closet was so full that there was no space anymore. It was an overwhelming time, I thought I was going crazy, I thought I was going through a depression because of what I was experiencing, one thing after the other.

All the traumas of the past surrounded me, the pain was intense, it was like they were telling me…hey here we are…. are you going face

us now, your closet is full dear we cannot fit in there anymore hahaha. All my mistakes, guilt, hurt, pain, disappointments, traumas came up to the surface. Every single thing that I went through surfaced, so I deal with it, and this stems way back from my childhood. I was so overwhelmed and in panic state, not knowing what to do, to whom I turn too. And what I did was pray. I had a conversation with God, and I opened up with him, I told him I am scared, I am lonely, and I do not want to feel this way anymore, and I asked him to help me to show me the way and send me the help that I needed.

After this prayer, things started to change, and very quick people started appearing in my life that offered me guidance, support, help and also more lessons and the possibility to share with them what I was going through. I googled and searched, read books, passages from each bible, spiritual books, and any information I could find.

The information though flowed on its own through me, what I read helped me to open that door that was closed, and most of what I

read was already part me, everything resonated, and this is how I discovered I have started my journey, and this was the start of my Spiritual Awakening.

I started to heal my past step by step. I saw that many others were going through the same things that I was going through, as much as overwhelming as it was, that was a relief knowing I was not alone. So, my shadow work began, and it was like an automatic process if you see it from a certain point of perspective. Dealing with traumas takes time, patience, observation of your patterns, and awareness and mostly it is the actions you take that are essential, as they are a major part of the process to heal your traumas. And it is a matter of changing your actions till that trauma or repeated pattern no longer exists.

Once a trauma was worked on, automatically that trauma disappeared, and another trauma pops in to be faced and dealt with. There was a sort of pattern when dealing with a trauma, once that trauma was healed, you would know that you healed it because the day it happens the feeling of liberation inside you, and the feeling of bliss and peace is felt at a very high level. I started doing meditation and yoga, reading informative articles, watching videos etc, and I found all these as tools that helped me during this initial process.

Having said that, life lessons never end, but it is how you tackle them that is important, its not about being perfect, its about changing repeatedly your actions. Apart from facing and dealing with all this I cannot be thankful enough of the blessings that I had along the way…and most often they stem from the exact same pain or trauma.

In the midst of a lot of chaos on the 20th of March 2020 I felt guided to create Ali Spiritual Life Coach. This has been another amazing experience in itself as I never imagined that I would create what I did. I knew that I had to help other people through my experiences and through my blessings. I wanted to share with you a little part of my journey. However, although I call myself a Spiritual Life Coach, I try to live by a quote that resonates with me to “be a learner first, a Master second and a student always” - Ernie J Zelinski.

  • Ali Spiritual Life Coach

When it comes in facing your traumas it can be very overwhelming. When you take out those skeletons from your closet, you will be faced with all the hurt and emotions of that particular trauma. So, what we automatically do is hide them and pretend they do not exist, and we continue with our daily lives. However, when we act this way, these traumas will appear over and over again, and the intensity of the trauma if not faced will be harder to deal with. What happens also is that we project these unresolved traumas on the people around us.

Your traumas will appear in other situations in different shapes and forms, and that pain will resurface over and over again, every time more intense, until its dealt with. When we escape from our traumas,

it is like sweeping dust under the carpet and pretending all is clean, same goes with your trauma’s. A past trauma will keep coming up in your life until you face it, feel it, accept it, make peace with it and let it go. It is easier said then done, however by taking a step by step approach and looking at your trauma from a different perspective this can be done, and once accomplished you will feel amazingly liberated and you are no longer attached to that trauma.

At the end we all want inner peace and happiness, but this cannot

be achieved until you are able to deal with these issues, because by making peace with yourself you can achieve peace within.